My god.
I am writing this in word, since blogger is being a bitch and a half.
So it is 3.44 am and I have been charged to represent mankind, as in men, better.
CHRIS MASTELLONE, NOT REPRESENTING MEN SINCE 1983
To begin with, I never considered myself much of a man in the sense that I don’t like to slap other guys on the ass over a touchdown, but rather celebrate with a contrived high five, or other self conscious act. I am a man by gender, and I like women in sexuality. Women is where I am going with this.
Is it wrong for a man to care about a woman? Heavens no. Should me just objectify women? Heavens no. What good what that lead to? Feelings would be hurt, and people would just be fucked up, emotionally and physically. People would be fucked ugly. That’s a new phrase I’m trying to introduce into the lexicon, so I hope that it fits.
Men, the men that I am most like, mourn the loss of a really good relationship. It is not self pity. It is not wallowing in how tough life is. It is the loss of a confidant, the closest friend that one could imagine, someone with whom you would share everything with, and in most extreme cases, give your life for. You have just lost someone who previously completed you.
Men don’t mourn over themselves, they mourn over the women that they lose. At least the good ones do. There are plenty of guys who want to fuck girls, and that’s it. They don’t care. I think that caring about someone makes them special. It may be naïve of me, but when I’m dating a girl, I want them to feel like they are the world, that they are the most meaningful thing in my life, because if I’m going to devote my time to someone, they damn well better be the most meaningful thing. I think that if you are in a relationship and the other person doesn’t matter, get out of it. It was not meant to be. That person should make you turn to jelly every time you see them. They should be just incredibly meaningful to you. No hook ups and all that shit. It’s just not cool.
But I am ranting, like I always do. With a breakup comes the loss of friends. I’m not talking about the kids that you party with. I’m talking about families, relatives, etc. Real people. They are gone after that. Why? Because no matter how much they liked you, no matter how close you were, kin will always matter more in their eyes. You have lost another family, especially if you have known them for a long time. I speak from personal experience when I say that while I missed Shannon a hell of a lot, I also missed her family and relatives. Pat and Ron and Joss really meant a lot to me, as well as her immediate family. But I am cut off. I could probably now reapproach them, and in fact, I think I will.
If you don’t cry over a relationship, what was it for? If it’s a few dates, and doesn’t work out, that’s one thing. Save the salt. But if you put in a big investment, emotionally, you should be torn up after it. It’ll put you in a funk. Love does that. Love can make people do anything that you can think of. Today I felt that tingle, that breathless feeling, for the first time in about a year. It really caught me by surprise, and made me feel great, but also sad. Love is like that.
Men are no worse than women. We are the same animals. Gender, physical and perceived, doesn’t matter. We treat each other differently, which means that we fuck each other over in different ways. We can all be horribly offensive, we can all really hurt, but when it comes don’t to it, why? Why do we? What reasoning do we have? Is it defenses? Did mom hug you too much, or not at all?
We all suck. We love, we hate, we get jealous, we are oblivious that we hurt other people, but we all feel these things. We can be disappointed with love, with life, with each other, but it shouldn’t last. Humanity should not tear itself apart over some frat boys yelling at some girls, or the sorority sister toying with the nerd’s emotions. That’s not a good reason to dissolve the race, the species of humanity.
If you are hurt by love, it’ll get better. For some it takes longer than others, but it’s a personal thing. You can’t rush this shit. Like I said, Love is immense, and when you have the most intense of emotions running wild in your person, you have to take into account that it can blowback and just fuck your life up. When love decides to blowback, the damage varies. Sometimes it’s a small thing, a night out with the boys and some chicken wings. Other times it’s a months long ordeal of not knowing exactly how to trust. Men and women do it. Don’t like chicken wings? Insert booze and or ice cream. Whatever food you want.
Ok. This is done.
“oh i could give a straight up goddamn
i could give you four or five of them
i got a thousand in my bank account
break it open let the goddamns walk out
all my traumas hinge upon
some convoluted axiom
of the cube of x plus y
equals itself divided by now
where have you gone?”
-ccm
(mike doughty for the lyric)
I am writing this in word, since blogger is being a bitch and a half.
So it is 3.44 am and I have been charged to represent mankind, as in men, better.
CHRIS MASTELLONE, NOT REPRESENTING MEN SINCE 1983
To begin with, I never considered myself much of a man in the sense that I don’t like to slap other guys on the ass over a touchdown, but rather celebrate with a contrived high five, or other self conscious act. I am a man by gender, and I like women in sexuality. Women is where I am going with this.
Is it wrong for a man to care about a woman? Heavens no. Should me just objectify women? Heavens no. What good what that lead to? Feelings would be hurt, and people would just be fucked up, emotionally and physically. People would be fucked ugly. That’s a new phrase I’m trying to introduce into the lexicon, so I hope that it fits.
Men, the men that I am most like, mourn the loss of a really good relationship. It is not self pity. It is not wallowing in how tough life is. It is the loss of a confidant, the closest friend that one could imagine, someone with whom you would share everything with, and in most extreme cases, give your life for. You have just lost someone who previously completed you.
Men don’t mourn over themselves, they mourn over the women that they lose. At least the good ones do. There are plenty of guys who want to fuck girls, and that’s it. They don’t care. I think that caring about someone makes them special. It may be naïve of me, but when I’m dating a girl, I want them to feel like they are the world, that they are the most meaningful thing in my life, because if I’m going to devote my time to someone, they damn well better be the most meaningful thing. I think that if you are in a relationship and the other person doesn’t matter, get out of it. It was not meant to be. That person should make you turn to jelly every time you see them. They should be just incredibly meaningful to you. No hook ups and all that shit. It’s just not cool.
But I am ranting, like I always do. With a breakup comes the loss of friends. I’m not talking about the kids that you party with. I’m talking about families, relatives, etc. Real people. They are gone after that. Why? Because no matter how much they liked you, no matter how close you were, kin will always matter more in their eyes. You have lost another family, especially if you have known them for a long time. I speak from personal experience when I say that while I missed Shannon a hell of a lot, I also missed her family and relatives. Pat and Ron and Joss really meant a lot to me, as well as her immediate family. But I am cut off. I could probably now reapproach them, and in fact, I think I will.
If you don’t cry over a relationship, what was it for? If it’s a few dates, and doesn’t work out, that’s one thing. Save the salt. But if you put in a big investment, emotionally, you should be torn up after it. It’ll put you in a funk. Love does that. Love can make people do anything that you can think of. Today I felt that tingle, that breathless feeling, for the first time in about a year. It really caught me by surprise, and made me feel great, but also sad. Love is like that.
Men are no worse than women. We are the same animals. Gender, physical and perceived, doesn’t matter. We treat each other differently, which means that we fuck each other over in different ways. We can all be horribly offensive, we can all really hurt, but when it comes don’t to it, why? Why do we? What reasoning do we have? Is it defenses? Did mom hug you too much, or not at all?
We all suck. We love, we hate, we get jealous, we are oblivious that we hurt other people, but we all feel these things. We can be disappointed with love, with life, with each other, but it shouldn’t last. Humanity should not tear itself apart over some frat boys yelling at some girls, or the sorority sister toying with the nerd’s emotions. That’s not a good reason to dissolve the race, the species of humanity.
If you are hurt by love, it’ll get better. For some it takes longer than others, but it’s a personal thing. You can’t rush this shit. Like I said, Love is immense, and when you have the most intense of emotions running wild in your person, you have to take into account that it can blowback and just fuck your life up. When love decides to blowback, the damage varies. Sometimes it’s a small thing, a night out with the boys and some chicken wings. Other times it’s a months long ordeal of not knowing exactly how to trust. Men and women do it. Don’t like chicken wings? Insert booze and or ice cream. Whatever food you want.
Ok. This is done.
“oh i could give a straight up goddamn
i could give you four or five of them
i got a thousand in my bank account
break it open let the goddamns walk out
all my traumas hinge upon
some convoluted axiom
of the cube of x plus y
equals itself divided by now
where have you gone?”
-ccm
(mike doughty for the lyric)
posted by CCMAS | 3:59 AM
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